The month brought the unexpected start of a new semester of teaching and work for me. While this normally wouldn't be a sad occasion for many folks, it was a reminder to us that we still hadn't received our child, and our hearts felt sad throughout the beginning of autumn. We expected that after so much waiting, we would have news to share by then.
We carried on and felt rejuvenated by October. It was time to fill the house with pumpkins, as decor and edible treats. We started paint work in our dining/piano room. Things were looking up.
Then I received a call from Mom. Grandma had been in a serious car accident. We packed up and headed to be with the family. Thankfully, my sister and her husband were free to come as well, and they picked up Dad on their way. My Mom's sisters and some cousins were all able to be there as well.
We were blessed that weekend with friends and family coming from near and far to offer support, prayers and meals. We were blessed that so many of our family were available to come on the spur of the moment and being together helped us stay strong for each other.
Grandpa showed us how to be faithful by continually staying by Grandma's side, and he showed us how to be forgiving by not holding any ill will towards the driver of the other vehicle.
We told Grandma that we loved her. It was difficult to leave the family on Sunday evening, and we left with heavy hearts.
I was home on Monday, waiting for phone calls, praying, crying, thinking about Grandma. I started preparing dinner and Mom called to tell me that Grandma had passed away. My heart crumbled into pieces. For some reason, I told myself, "Grandma would keep cooking dinner," so I continued preparing dinner, crying over the soup pot. Grandma always cared for her family, especially in her meal preparations, and immediately I felt the instinct to carry on like her.
Her loss was very unexpected.
We miss her greatly, and we know we will see her again, but the grief we feel is real and will be there for quite awhile. She was a special lady. Just yesterday, I was thinking about all the reminders of her I have in our home. In our guest room we have a framed cross-stitch that she made for me, in the baby's room we have a sweet blanket she gave us last Christmas, in the entryway we have a painting she made, in the piano room I have her Christmas village displayed, in the living room we have another painting she made, and in our room I have displayed a Santa she gave me several years ago at Christmas. I just need something for the kitchen - I will have to sneak something out of Grandpa's house the next time we visit!
It feels like the pain is worse because it was unexpected. We didn't have time to prepare. But it was not unexpected to God. He knew the plan for Grandma's life. He did give us time to prepare, we just didn't know it at the time. He blessed us with happy celebrations of their 60th wedding anniversary, their 80th birthdays, a huge family reunion vacation and a trip back to their previous home in Missouri. Grandma was His faithful servant, and He prepared a place for her in heaven. I hope she lives next door to Hannah!
1 comment:
Thanks for sharing with everyone, Kristin. Such a great loss for us all because our love for Grandma -- and her love for us - was so great. I'm so glad we were all able to be with Grandma in the hospital.
I don't know if you know how much comfort and support you and Shawn and Kelli and Jake have been to me at a time when I've really needed it. I feel like I've failed a little in comforting you because I've needed so much myself. I guess we'll just walk through this all together. I pray that God will continue to comfort you in your sadness over losing Grandma. I bet she is having some wonderful times holding Hannah. She's probably telling her all about the family :) Love you!!
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